STUPID!

STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!

So I had a few magazines from work (believe it or not, I'm actually supposed to read magazines at work for story ideas) that I brought home to peruse. They'd made their way through our house--coffee table, nightstand, etc.

Well I brought them back into work earlier this week and left them sitting on my desk. Sticking out of them? My OV-Watch manual. No joke.

Luckily, no one comes that far into my cube that they could see something like that, but seriously? How dumb can I be?

Comical

Hello there friends, chart stalkers, and internet creepies,

97.18 reported in for duty again this morning and my OV-Watch has declared it "Less Fertile Day 1." My thoughts? Oh well, what can ya' do?

Really, it's no biggie. I'm shocked that I'm already on CD22 (and I actually had to look because I knew I was in the 20's, but didn't know the exact date... Yay for me not being obsessive!) so who knows? Even if I O on CD65, maybe I won't be so crabby about it this time. It also buys me some time to vacation shop and think about getting my non-KU self into bikini shape for this summer. (Yeah. It could happen.)

Well, O, whenever you wanna come out to play, you know where to find me! *wanders off into the garden*

It'll happen in good time, my pretties. All in good time...

My admirer is back.

97.18 popped over to say hello this morning. Apparently it missed me. I feel so loved!

This becomes non-good news because it means that I didn't ovulate yesterday. Today is OV-Day 2, so it's OV-Watch's last day to give a correct reading. It also sucks because DH and I stayed up way past our bedtimes in order to commemorate the (potential) ovulation with a quality romp.

That meant that this morning I was completely exhausted, woke up late, forgot both deodorant and face lotion, and was totally late to work. What can I say? I am a petite flower who needs her beauty rest and when I don't get it, I'm a real wet rag.

Last (but not least) I would like to continue the parade of congratulatory praise and well wishes for mandee from GP for her long awaited BFP--4 or so years in the making! xoxo and truck load of sticky dust!

OV-Day 1 = FAIL

Yeah, so that Fertile Day 4 reading? You know, the one that was supposed to motivate me to rock DH's world last night? Well, apparently that will was not as strong as the will to fall asleep while reading Artie Lange's biography, "Too Fat to Fish" last night.

DH had announced he was going to bed early, so I offered to join him. I went upstairs, read for awhile, and he didn't appear. This morning he reported that when he came up at 10, I was dead to the world.

Then this morning, as I awoke and saw the OV-Day 1 reading on my watch, I reached out, hoping for a little good morning greeting... only to find that he was out of bed already. (insert, "Booo!" here)

I went downstairs and showed him the reading, as he was getting ready for work and he asked if that meant that I needed to see him upstairs. He seemed a little nervous - I didn't know if it was because of the pressure of the situation or because he was running late for his early work time, but I just said that it meant that if we didn't head upstairs this morning, that we should later this afternoon. His call, no pressure.

I read another chapter of Artie's book as I listened to him turning on the shower.

*sigh* I fail at this. I've had the greatest intentions of hitting every fertile day and possibly twice on OV-days... but I suck apparently.

Girls who like boys

I come from a family of three girls, so I used to think that I could only imagine myself with a girl--but last month something happened that changed my way of envisioning my (phantom) future. Do you remember the Valentine's Day drawing DH made me--it's him holding our two cats and it just said, "Happy Valentine's Day from your boys."

Anyway, there was something about being the mother hen to a this funny, rowdy bunch of boys that suddenly warmed my heart. Since then when I think about having kids, I smile at both the idea of either gender instead of just naturally envisioning a girl.

Oh, and I totally went out and bought that "Daddy's Little Skipper" shirt that I posted awhile ago. And we were at World Market and they had this pirate hooded towel that DH picked up with this look on his face and I just about melted. I was tempted to go back and buy it to hide it away, but it was $20, looked a little cheap, and I just couldn't justify the purchase. I will not be someone who stockpiles cute things (if I can help it).

So I'm sitting here at my desk, daydreaming about one last magical Christmas season of it being just me and DH, rubbing my KU belly and dreaming about our future. It's so dang romantic that it makes me *almost* want to TTA for the next few weeks... But I'm not that stupid, nor do I operate in a dream world and I will gladly accept a baby whenever fate would like to send one my way. So the BD'ing continues!

Today is Fertile Day 4 on my OV-Watch (it has been counting from 1-4). Then it will give me two days of ovulation reading and two post-ovulation days. So we will see shortly if the dang thing works, or if it can be faked out. I'm just going to try to keep myself nice and calm and relatively distracted to avoid delaying ovulation. I have a busy enough week with fun plans every night, but I promise to be a good little girl and not throw off my temps.

*Points at chart*Sigh* I know, I know, you chart stalkers are probably ready to kill me, but I've been having so much fun! There have been nights of fun, disrupted sleep, and let's not forget the few bottles of wine that have been consumed along the way. But with O potentially approaching, I'm back on the wagon. I've had my fun (and it was awesome!)

Attacked!

I was attacked last night--by my OV-Watch, that is!

I think one of my sensors on my OV-Watch is drying out already, so last night I let it sit on some water for a few minutes, then I reattached. When I tested it right away, it worked, but then I'd wait an hour or so and test again and it wasn't working.

I did a longer soak and then it would only work when I pressed down on the face. I tightened the band a bit and went to bed.

But then I woke up at 6:00 a.m. to this (or something similar--I stole this from Google Images, but it's probably pretty similar in level of swelling)... If I hadn't just read about this happening in an Amazon.com review, I probably would've freaked out. I could not believe that my hand had swollen so much!

So I took off the watch, shook my hand and massaged it for awhile and then kept waking up to check on it.

If anyone is chart stalking me, pay no attention to this morning's temp. My cats were all over the place, waking me up, I had this random swollen hand, and OH YEAH! I drank an entire bottle of wine last night! LOL! It was a delicious French Cote du Rhone red that I spread out over several hours (like 5) so I didn't get bombed, but I certainly drank the whole thing myself.

Today is my last day of soy, so it turns out that I did 2 days of 80mg and three days of 120. I've decided to take it as a positive that I got all mixed up on my amounts (and I had a few times that I suddenly couldn't remember what cycle day I was on) because it shows that I'm not obsessing.

I'm off to go to a baby shower today. It'll be fine--I'm just crossing my fingers that I know more people than the mom-to-be and DH's ex girlfriend, who I think will be there. This didn't bother me at first, but then DH mentioned a few times that he thought it was weird that I was going to go (the dad to be was one of our groomsmen and I adore this girl, why would I not go?) Then I was standing in the gift wrap aisle, completely overthinking if I should go festive and gender neutral (so I could use the rest of the wrapping paper roll for another shower), traditional boy, or really trendy.

It was at that moment that I realized that I was trying to be Little Miss Perfect because I knew she'd be there. I immediately gave myself a mental bitch-slap and walked up to the counter with the gender neutral paper. Screw it. I'm better than that!

I am, however, wearing my amazing pink Burberry skirt, heels, and accessorizing the gift with gorgeous satin ribbon and a silk flower. Eat that! ;-)

Vacation, all I ever wanted...

Well, while I was surfing the crimson wave, I subconsciously decided to take a mini vaycay from blogging, as I see that I haven't posted in a handful of days. It's so unusual for me to not report in my every single emotion and feeling.

But enough about me. Let's talk about you. Are you okay? Did you miss me terribly? Shit, there I go again with the talking about me again. *le sigh* What can ya do?

Well, I guess that only leaves me with talking about myself again. It's CD5 and I'm doing the soy isoflavones (I did 1 pill daily last time with no side effects or issues, so I'm bumping it up to 2 this cycle) for CD5-9 again and taking vitex daily. My most recent concern is how short my periods are (about 3 days long, 2 light, 1 medium, and then scant spotting yesterday), but I'm not letting it bother me. I'm also using the OV-Watch and I really should go get back into the tea thing.

So my wish for this cycle is just to ovulate earlier than CD60. I'm not feeling stressed at all and I definitely feel a ton of pressure lifted that I had last cycle. In fact, I think I'd be really happy with a 2010 baby, so this whole "last cycle to have a 2009 baby" thing isn't affecting me at all.

I'm just so grateful to know that I'm not broken... I *can* ovulate and one day this will work out. That's good enough for me!