Kudos to my ute

I added my ticker to the top of the blog again, I haven't decided if I'm going to link it to my chart again or not. I'm not temping yet, so it doesn't really matter at this point. I was, however, shocked to log into Fertility Friend and realize that I had Jude 40 days ago. That's crazy.

I had my post partum checkup yesterday and my OB says that my ute and cervix are all healed and back to normal size/location. He also clarified on the timing in light of my long cycles--I don't have to wait two full cycles to try again, we should just wait about 12 weeks total. He said that's just a general timeframe that they give out for healing, but that I looked good already...

When I was in the hospital, I cracked a few jokes about having lady bits of steel because it took over 24 hours of cytotec doses and they kept having to up my dose... So it looks like I'm retaining my rockstar cervix status. I mean, I need *something* to be able to brag about, right?

So if I don't get AF by the end of the month, I can call for provera and after AF arrives would have me at the 12 month mark. I still don't know if we're going to TTC right away or not. At the moment my gut is yes, but things seem to change on a daily basis so I'm sorta reserving the right to change my mind. DH hasn't expressed his opinion other than this hasn't changed his desire to have children, but I know he has more issues to be working out right now.

The one thing I have realized and made clear is that I cannot have a similar due date to Jude--for a nice handful of reasons. In fact, I may need to block out a 3 month due date period (Dec/Jan/Feb) just to avoid it. So if we do try and don't get lucky right away, there will probably be a March/April/May break.

Granted, I understand that life has it's own funny sense of humor and could pull a fast one on me, but I just need to do anything in my power to not have similar pregnancy timing. I think it would just be too much for me. Jan 2011 should be Jude's 1st birthday and also? I was reading last night in one of my pregnancy/infant loss books about how it can make the 2nd child feel like more of a "replacement child" and that it's normal to be sad at that time of year, so it may make it hard to celebrate another child's birthday.

So... that's where I'm at with this whole "When will you have another baby?" conversation, so I just thought I'd share.